Skip to main content

I am FAT

Hello, my name is Mariann and I am fat.

Yes, fat. I mean overweight, perhaps even obese to most. No, I am not writing this to gain sympathy, attention or hate. I am writing this for me, and every other person who struggles with self confidence.

As someone who has always been a 'plus sized girl', this was never news to me and that's okay. That being said, I never knew it was okay until recently.

Fat is a word that has been taken and twisted by a majority of things. Media, society, science, and even family and friends. These influences have always come and go from our daily lives and contort what we know and believe.

Fat is just a word. A word with three letters. One word, that does not define WHO I am, what I do, or even what I plan to be. So, with this being said, let me start over.

Hello, my name is Mariann and I have fat. I also have two blue eyes that tend to change colour every so often. I have curly hair, and a lot of freckles. I have two hands and two feet. I have a tendency to speak more often than I should. I have large dreams that most say are not logical. I have an apartment that is shared with four other people. I have a kind heart with the capacity to love and accept those who are often marginalized by their race, religion, sexual orientation, gender and past history.

You see, I have a lot of things. Not one of these things define me, because every little part of me makes me who I am.

Labels such as the words fat and skinny are not a definition of who you are. They do not make or break you, they are just words. Words that you throw around everyday, but often not many realize that when you throw words around like this, it can and will hurt others. You see, fat is not the only label I am marked with. I've been called many things, and so have the people that I love.

Gay. Dyke. Bible-thumper. Whale. Twig. Four eyes. Big nosed. Whore.

These labels, and many others provide an unnecessary pressure to those who feel it most. So what if you have glasses? You also have a bright smile, a shining personality and a great sense of humour. It is one of the many things that make you...you. Unique. Individual.

There is a lot of pressure placed by those around you to be someone you are not. To be different, more different than you are now. Perhaps even to conform to what society believes is 'normal'.

For years I have been on a weight-loss journey to help my body and my self confidence. Years, being marked with labels has torn my mental health to shreds, to the point I couldn't look in a mirror. It happens, and it happens too often to people everywhere. Men, woman, non-binary peoples, teenagers; everyone. With determination, I have been able to change my physical appearance and lose some weight. But even then, I didn't love myself.

Through working through my mental struggles of self image, I have worked up to a happy and safe place. I began to see my progress as not only helping me, but enhancing what beauty I already had. Features that made me physically beautiful. It is true, beauty is not only skin deep. That is where my journey came in. To even further my confidence, I found my determination to better myself even more beautiful than my physical appearance. My willingness to adapt, grow and excel - to prosper even furthering that belief.

Life is about moments. Moments to cherish. Moments to remember. Moments that make a difference. All I can do is celebrate all the moments I have now, on a go forward basis and be the best friend/family member/human I can be, in this moment.


Even if I’m not okay. Because, that is also okay.


One day, it won't matter what those have called me. One day, that time in all of our lives will be considered the past. The time where labels like that are petty. One day, we’ll be able to look back as our future selves and see where we all changed – for the better. We truly recognize our own beauty. Now I truly believe that everyone is beautiful. Physically, emotionally and spiritually.


There is a certain strength that comes from realizing your weaknesses. Labels. Everyone goes through these labels differently. Some need to find ways to see their labels as a strength instead of a weakness. Sometimes it takes time. That is okay. It's okay to not be okay.

What we can do as people is surround those with positivity and encouragement. If someone wants to wear something that makes them feel good about themselves, do not tell them to go change, or to cover themselves up. Telling them to change how they cope will not only hurt at the present time, but tear down all the handwork of rebuilding that self-confidence. 

So yes, I am fat. Now, I am a little 'less' fat. I am big, but that is not all that I am. I have the power to change if I want to, but only on my terms. Not for anyone else, but for me. It has taken me time to rebuild myself to where I am now, and I am not through with my journey. I have a long way to go, but my journey is not my weakness anymore. It is my strength. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Welcome to my blog!

Hello everyone, and welcome to my blog!  I have decided to make a personal blog site. This means that every blog that is posted here will be authentic to me. All thoughts and opinions are my own unless otherwise said. Some posts will be strongly opinionated. Others may cause some discomfort. I write in order to cause YOU to think. I want you to question what I post. I want you to think, feel and have an opinion.  I have been very busy in the writing scene. I am currently working on two novels. One is a collaborative novel and the other is my novel that I've been working on since November 2014. My solo novel will be released January 2017 for public viewing and purchase. The profits from sales will be donated to different organizations/families each month. I will keep you posted on more novel information as it becomes available. Also, I've been a reviewer for local shows and performances. I am excited to share those with you! Reviews will be posted on here within the wee

Good people, good energy.

         Being around good people with good energy is priority.        We have this hero complex where we think we're always the exception to the rule. We're not addicted to our phones, it is everyone else. The age of pointing fingers. We don't get influenced by advertising, that is everyone else. We are too smart, "woke", or whatever word we want to use to decorate our delusions.      A large one is assuming we can influence others, without them influencing us. We have great chemistry, horrible chemistry, and everything in between with people, but it is chemistry none the less, and no one walks away the same after we cross paths. There's no shortage of people who need support, we all do, but some of us haven't taken the very crucial first step: helping ourselves.         When you have good energy, you'll attract other good energy, but you'll also attract energy that's toxic. Everyone is worth helping, and even absorbing some of that toxic ener

Growing up or growing out?

You may outgrow people in your life, and people in your life may outgrow you. That's not tragic, that's normal. Growth is life. Before we divorce our friends, let's divorce the idea that it has to be all or nothing. We don't need to have people as only a "best friend" OR completely cut out of our lives. It's okay to have people in our lives that we can only enjoy in moderation. Plenty of my friends live lifestyles and have priorities that don't line up with mine, and that doesn't mean I have to delete them from my life, it just means I can enjoy them in small doses.  We do ourselves and others a disservice when we decide that our history is more important than our future. When we notice our paths heading away from each other, we clinch arms, and both of us fall off course. The only thing we can be promised in life is change, whether that's change for the better or worse, is something our attitudes can impact. I'm not going to mourn a fr